On being the toxic friend, from beginning to end.

Illustration by

I thought it was never going to happen, but I’ve finally gathered my peanuts in a bowl, mushed them to a thick, crunchy paste, and can say that I’m finally ready to spread this peanut butter to the far corners of the slice of toast that is what you’re about to read.

I was recently confronted with the harsh, soul-crushing truth that I was an emotionally abusive human being. What people would commonly do when they are hit with such a difficult reality is either lash out, or find a million…


The emotional shopping list of running away from your problems

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Dubai

Ages ago I remember sitting in a café and overhearing a conversation between two women who, by their wonderfully lyrical accents were from South America. They were talking about living in Dubai and when it came to one of them uttering “the cost of living”, to my ear, and with their accents, it sounded more like “the cost of leaving”. This tiny, usually unnoticeable moment, is what prompted this article.

I’ve always pondered on what it means to physically leave, by one’s own will. When you’ve put so much time…


On wanting to remember what the brain doesn’t

illustration by @ajsaajsaajsa

What I remember

I recently had a life-threatening accident. Had it not been for my chubby body which cushioned me in all the right ways, doctors clearly told me that I might not have made it. I fell 7 meters (approximately 22 ft.) down an elevator shaft and fractured my spine. From the friends who were with me at the moment of the fall, I was told I first hit a ledge at around 3.5 meters and then fell to the ground.

I was unconscious for two or three minutes. I vividly remember waking up, lying on this moist, oily ground, hyperventilating, an…

ajsaajsaajsa

Bottomless pits of thought and I’m here to heal.

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